You would be dead to me some day
Like withered leaves
from a perpetual autumn
Just like i died
When you left me

I Got The Signal!!

as i sit here typing this post, this feels to be one of the weirdest moments in the past one year of my life. the reason might seem trivial to some, but what is happening right now in my room is ... something that has never happened in the past year. I HAVE SIGNAL ON MY MOBILE PHONE!!!

arrived on campus an year ago and took the Airtel connection which came with some incentive scheme for students. since that fateful day, i can count on my fingertips the number of days that i saw one bar (maximum) of signal on my phone in my room. if i had to call someone, i had to walk out of my room...right thru the corridor, turn into the right side of the wing, hold the mobile phone up like a tracking device till it showed some signal, and then stand exactly there and make the call. and dont even ask what happened if someone called me. in all probability, i would be unreachable if i was in my room. in my work life, i would have paid extra to get a phone which was unreachable all the time, but here...i wanted signal. so if someone called and fortunately my phone rang, i would pick it up and rush out thru the corrridor to find a spot where the signal showed two bars and then i would take the call. the situation was so bad that if my frends in other blocks wanted to find out whether i was in my room or not, they would call. if i was unreachable...they trooped to my room.

one day i even lost my temper and marched to the guy who had sold me the connection. and his telling me that he was AWARE OF THE SITUATION didnt help my temper either. i demanded the number of the person incharge of the area from Airtel. and i blasted him like anything and told him to refund my money. also because i had promptly paid up a HUGE deposit in advance for an year long validity while signing up without realising that my room did not have network coverage from airtel. after getting lambasted, the guy promised a repeater tower on the roof of my block. and true to his word the repeater tower appeared on the rooftop within a week, with some bulb like things being extended throughout my corridor, one of them right in front of my room. so when i see this bulb like thing in front of my room, i am filled with happiness hitherto unknown. so i take the phone out of my pocket - only to find ................................zero signal. i decide to give the buggers the benefit of doubt, so i hold up my phone again like a tracking device in the direction of the bulb. No signal still. i follow the cabling all the way to the repeater tower, holding the tracking devince in my hand and voila!!! i have signal: right under the tower!!. but how the heck is this situation better! i still have to run to the tower rather than to the other side of the corridor which was anyway closer. for a few days i sat right under the tower to make any phone calls, trying my best to ignore the swarms of mosquitos that i think have been overlooked by people trying to find a way to reduce their weight. come to think of it, it's a totally organic, natural and effective way if you can adjust with the side effects!

the situation was so bad that i even thought of cross marking with a chalk the points where we had signal in the corridor so we dint have to search everytime.

and today, finally, after exhausting the advance that i had paid to airtel an year ago, i feel like a completely new and free man. i have a reliance Smart connection. and it shows full signal with all bars in my room. to tell u honestly, somewhere deep inside i am scared that when i get up tomorrow, the bars would be gone. and i would have to find new spots in the corridor. i hope i dont get nightmares tonite about this at least. i know its weird to be scared of THIS of all things, but yes, i feel the fear. its palpable. its real. who knows what ll happen tomorrow morning. i am calling my frends tonight.

Winning

Why is it important to win everytime?...only to be slaves of our destiny. When will we be free?

Again

Exams are here...again :((. i guess it ll be another fortnite away from surfin like a free bird.

Attraction and Chastity - Episode 6

This is going to be the last episode of this series for a couple of reasons. One, i think its been quite a while since i started the story. Last CAT came and went, and its almost time for this year's CAT, which Nattu wud be writing. Two, i think i am going to conclude this story and write to both of em with the link...i want to see both their reactions.

Recap: Gattu sends Nattu a gift which she returns. So they meet somewhere in their office building where they talk for a while and then she returns his gift which is a small toy. Gattu tries to convince her that its just a small gift and that he cant take it back. She doesnt relent and so he takes it back and throws it in the bin. They both go back to their respective offices.

Episode 6: Gattu spends the night slogging in office and brooding over whatever happened. i was with him till around midnight after which i think he really drowned himself in work. He dint take a single break the entire day next day and kept working at his seat. Finally i dragged him down for a smoke at 6 in the evening. So there we were, smoking away happily at our "panchayat spot" and there comes Nattu walking down the ramp nearby. Gattu looks at her and looks away. Somewhere inside i felt happy for him...the guy was totally getting himself into a heartache situation. so i thot his grief story was finally coming to an end.
Gattu finished his smoke and went back to his seat. At around 8, he got an email from Nattu

Nattu: Still in office?

I dont know whether Gattu shud have replied to the email or not...but he did.

Gattu: Yes
Nattu: Why dont you meet me at 9:30 if you are not busy.
Gattu: OK

so there he goes again, out to make a fool of himself once more. they meet near the fountain, Nattu looking askance all the while to see if someone is watching them, which makes Gattu feel kinda stupid. She wants to walk to the other block of this huge office building. Who is Gattu to object :). so they walk to the other side and they start talking...

Gattu: so whassup?Nattu: i think i was very rude to you last nite when i refused that gift.

<...silence...Gattu is wondering if she is going to say anything further. so he waits...silence...finally he gets tired of the uncomfortable silence which according to him was at least 2 minutes but i think it wud have been a few seconds at max actually.>

Gattu: so?
Nattu: so i think i shud say sorry for last nite
Gattu: hey wait a minute, so you called me downstairs to meet you just to say sorry? If thats all you called me here for, I think you know what you are doing and may be I should be getting back now.
Nattu: I dont know why my boss wants my team tostay back on Friday nights. There is some stupid conference every week where we have to be present.

Then her phone rings and she starts talking. Minutes go by. Gattu once again is feeling like the fool in the scene. she talks and she talks and she talks. Gattu heaves a sigh of relief when she is done.

Gattu: Since you never reply to my mails, I assume you dont want to talk to me. Why are we talking right now?
Nattu: Your mails are good entertainment
Gattu: <.laughs.>
Nattu: I think i ll have to wait for the next cab now
Gattu: I can drop you home if you want.<there he goes...> Where do you live?
Nattu: I live on XYZ road. What vehicle do you have?
Gattu: I have a ABC...you have seen me on it earlier of course. You want me to drop you?
Nattu: No thanks, i think i ll take the cab.
Gattu: Hey listen, I 'll be going abroad for a few weeks this weekend. if I call you from there, would you talk to me?
Nattu: Why would you waste your money calling me from there?
Gattu: look, may be i am mistaken, but the way we have been looking at each other, i thought there was a spark somewhere and that is why i wrote to you in the first place.
Nattu: hey give me some tips about CAT
Gattu: You can use my study material if you want. I am not studying much anyway. Just dont get the time.
Nattu: I already have the material from Coaching institute C and Institute T. But I have heard that Insti P's test series is really good. Do you have it?
Gattu: I dont have P's test series myself but I might be able to arrange it.
Nattu: Ok. I think its time for my cab now. I am going.

They say Bye and the meeting ends. Gattu comes back to his seat. Doesn't know if he can say whatever happened was positive or negative. But his goal is clear - he has to arrange for the test series of Insti P somehow.
He spends the next day trying to figure out if P has a branch nearby and is not very happy to find out that they dont have a branch in that state, leave apart that city. Now what?
He does what any fool atracted to a girl would do. he calls up a friend in Delhi, makes her go to the P center and get herself enrolledfor P's test series even though this friend finished her MBA from an IIM 3 years ago. And Gattu is ready to take this favour so he can arrange the material for Nattu.

In the meanwhile, Gattu has to travel abroad for work. He calls Nattu a couple of times from there. There is some small talk and she asks him again why he is calling her. And then, she tells him clearly she is not interested in him and doesnt see any reason why she should be talking to him. They have a minor altercation. Gattu takes offence and stops calling.

Few weeks down the line, Gattu comes back to India and finds a courier waiting for him. Its from his friend in Delhi and has the first few papers from P's test series. needless to say, he is sad to see the package and doesnt know what to do with it. Though CAT is just around a month away, he doesnt know if he himself is going to have the time to study. So he gets the first paper xeroxed and sends a copy over to Nattu. As expected, Nattu calls back...

Nattu: Hi, did you send me a courier?
Gattu: Hi...yes
Nattu: Whats in it?
Gattu: I am in a meeting right now. Can i call you in a half hour?
Nattu: OK
After a half hour...
Gattu: Hi
Nattu: yes
Gattu: its the paper you had asked for
Nattu: Please dont bother.

Gattu is furious. He went through all the trouble for THIS? He even troubled his friend and took a favour. But he doesnt say anything to Nattu and hangs up.
He keeps getting couriers from his friend every week but doesnt send anything to Nattu. CAT comes and goes, and so do many other exams. Gattu still thinks about Nattu a lot but doesnt wait to get a glimpse of her downstairs. He is kinda sad about how the whole thing went. Once the results are out, he calls Nattu once again and they talk for a while. He finds out that she doesnt have any interview call and he has one, which he is not very hopeful about or keen on either.

(I didnt mention earlier that Gattu had joined some test series in his own city somewhere towards the end and when he reached there the first day, he saw Nattu there too. On another day, they evenhappenedto be in the same room. But they acted as perfect strangers and didnt talk).

Now that Gattu doesnt have any hopes for this year, he plans to prepare again and decides to join a coaching institute regularly for this year. he knows Nattu would be preparing again too so he picks up a branch which Nattu is not likely to come to and which is not very far from his office either. I support him in his decision to pick a branch where Nattu is not likely to come cos i think the guy doesnt doesnt deserve to embarass himself further. Has been enough.

So he enrolls himself there and on his first day there, yes, he sees Nattu standing there.

Now before yu think this story has taken a filmi turn, let me tell you that this story does not have a happy or sad ending. It is from real life, and like most things in real life, the sequence of events just culminated...somewhere....without a conclusion. Gattu made it thru his interview and quietly vanished from the scene. Nattu is going to appear for CAT again this year no November 20th. They havent communicated ever since Gattu vanished. And that......is where our story ends.

I dont know what both of them would make of it when I send this link to them. Gattu, surely is going to read all episodes multiple times over coz i know him weel. Nattu, well may be she'll mark my mail as spam and send it straight to the recycle bin.

Gattu, my frend, i know you come out looking like a sorry idiot but then, its just Nattu, you and me and all three of us know everything already.

Nattu, you must be a really nice girl. This narration is just my perspective of how things went in front of my eyes. I am going to write to you after your big exam.

and both of you, If you happen to read this, I would like to know what you have to say about it all, about any of the episodes anywhere. I might have missed out some minor details here and there.

and the audience, who has been reading this all along, what do you have to say about Nattu and Gattu? Do you think Gattu went a little overboard or not?

post

Have been thinking about posting for so long now but seems like life aint giving any free time at all. at times, while in the middle of running for something, feel sad when i think i havent posted properly for a long time. i want to...just that...urghh.
am determined to post the final episode of Attraction and Chastity within the coming week.

best frends

what do you make of it when your best frend of years doesnt have time for you anymore. not even five minutes in a month to pick up the phone and make a small call and say they are there. or just write a one liner mail to ask if you are fine?

i am not liking this. :(

nooooooooo

exams starting tomm. i want to sleep :((...even if just for an hour. one of those days again when i am wondering if its worth it